Parenting Your Teenager: How to Say NO!
Q: Whenever we tell my daughter "no," she just bugs and pesters until we give in. I know it's wrong to give in, but she makes things so unpleasant that we give in just to make peace. How can we turn this situation around?
A: You have a problem. Your daughter knows that your nos are not to be taken seriously. When you say "no" and then give in to the inevitable hassling and begging that follows, you teach your daughter that "no" does not mean "no."
She has learned that no really means
"I just haven't bugged and hassled and manipulated and pressured my parents enough to get to yes, so I now need to do more."
And every child I have ever known is more than up to that task.
It is possible to turn this situation around; you just have to be willing to commit to see this through to the end, because you are in for a battle.
Preparing to say NO
As you begin to say "no," your daughter is going to respond with a flood of what's called "change back behavior." She has had it made for a while now, and she is not going to give this up easily.
There is a very important reason I stress seeing this through to the end.
If you begin to say "no," hold your ground longer than before, and then give in, you have made the situation even worse than before.
So count the cost before you begin, agree together to say "no," stand your ground, and batten down the hatches.
This is going to take a while.
While you are saying "no," it's useful to consider together what things to which you can say "yes." A "yes" here and there, when appropriate, go a long way to strengthening your "no."
Eventually, your daughter will learn that your yes is yes and your no is no.
For more tips and tools for parenting your teenager, visit parenting coach Jeff Herring's ParentingYourTeenager.com
10 Steps to School Year Success
One of the most important aspects of parenting, is ensuring that your child gets a good education. School is a place where your child not only learns skills such as reading and writing; it is also where your child will learn about friendship, responsibility, and fairness.
Parenting - The Irrational Vocation
There are some grounds to assume that a cognitive dissonance is involved in feeling that children are more a satisfaction than a nuisance. Why do people bother with parenting? It is time consuming, exhausting, strains otherwise pleasurable and tranquil relationships to their limits.
Co-sleeping, a personal story
When I was pregnant, we knew that we had some fairly fixed ideas about how we wanted to raise our child, including allowing her to share our bed for as long as she wanted to.We have been shocked and sometimes upset at other people's reaction to what seemed to be a very instinctive decision, to sleep with our daughter.
The Secret To Keeping Kids Interested on Family Vacations
Vacations and trips are great family events, but how do you keep kids interested and busy during the down times? Have them keep journals of the trips and their impressions.Writing JournalsTake a minute to give some consideration to your most recent family vacation.
Communications for Family Emergencies
You know that children can get into trouble. The older they get, the bigger the problem as history would have it.
Twins - Double The Trouble Or Double The Pleasure? Both!
If You're Having Twins..
Starting School - What Age Should Children Begin School?
"What age should my child start school?"This is a common question that concerns many parents. It is complicated if your child's birthday happens to fall near a closing date for new school enrolments.
The following spelling games can be used by parents to reinforce spelling in children:SPELLING GAME 1: USE BOARD GAMES, SUCH AS MONOPOLYPlay any game that is normally played with dice with the child -- Monopoly, for example. The parent can continue to move her token forward in the normal way by throwing the dice, but the child must orally spell a word to move forward.
8 Tips To Save On Child Care Costs
Child care costs are are one of the most expensive costs associated with going back to work. Finding ways to cut down on child care costs without sacrificing quality child care is a top priority for all working parents.
Strengths and Weaknesses
All too often, children with learning disabilities are seen through their weaknesses. Like anyone else, however, they have many strengths.
Internet Dangers - Protecting Children from Internet Jeopardy
Parents are in a unique position to "monitor" their children's internet activities and to observe their behavior with respect to any actions generated by the child's internet use. If children are hiding something from a parent, usually an astute parent will sense that something is askew.
Spend Time Not Money With The Kids This Winter
Spending quality time with your children doesn't need to cost a lot of money. What's most important, is that you take the opportunity to bond with them.
A Mothers Love
Once upon a time there was a beautiful bird whose golden feathers and sweet voice attracted attention where ever she went. She was not only beautiful but also extremely intelligent and talented and she longed to leave the nest and try her wings out in the big world.
What Do Chinese Water Torture and Arguing with Children Have in Common?
Imagine yourself lying flat on your back, totally strapped down onto a cold, hard table, unable to move any part of your body. You can't see anything around you because your eyes are covered.
Responding to Criticism Without Being Defensive
In an actual war, to be attacked means to have our survival threatened. Thus, we might chose between surrender, withdrawal, or counterattack.
Diaper Bags for Dads - Papas Got a Brand New Bag
Today's dads are more hands-on than ever before and their involvement is being rewarded with parenting gear designed with men in mind. Many items that have typically been designed for the maternal side of the parental equation are now being introduced in masculine styles, colors, and fabrics, including diaper bags, baby carriers, and strollers.
How Many Sex Offenders Live On Your Block?
For any parent, learning that a convicted sex offender lives on the same block, can be a chilling discovery. The thought of it alone, can be disturbing.
Teaching Problem Solving Skills to Children with ADHD
Even though the "Stop and Think" movement in ADHD treatment has lost some momentum lately, the basic strategies and techniques are still worth teaching your children. My favorite version of the technique it the "Five Step Problem Solving Strategy," and it goes something like this.
Raising Strong Daughters
When my daughter was born, I must admit there was a distinctly different feeling to it. Part of me was thrilled, but part of me was unsure of how to deal with a gender I still couldn't quite understand.
Responsible Fatherhood - A Unique And Irreplaceable Role!
Something happened the other day that made me feel uneasy. Yet I shouldn't have felt that way!My wife had left for work and I was hanging the washing out to dry.
|home | site map|